I cannot say when it started. One day I fell into a deep depression. I felt lonely and powerless. I couldn't stop feeling that way. Something was missing - An adventure!
Yes. I've always been searching for something completely different. I wanted to get out of this grey world, where no one cares about the others. I wanted to change, to become a completely new person, to find joy and happiness, freedom, love and life. All those things I desired where out of my reach and I knew that my dream would never become true. That's why I started inventing stories.
I don't have talent to write down those thoughts and wishes. (Though, when I was a little girl, my dream was to become a writer ^^') That's the reason why I haven't told anyone about my blogs. Why... I created them?? I'm not sure. It was just a boredom attack - which, in the end, overcame me u_u (I'm so weak)
I think that you need a special gift to become a writer. You can't learn it. Inventing interesting stories is one thing, but telling them the way people stop only to listen to your words (or to read your text) is completely different. I hadn't that talent, I couln't make people enjoy my words. And so I decided to do something different - something I was able to learn. Because I've always been good working with my hands, I started drawing. And it seems like I've found my fountain of hope and life in this art.
My first steps were awful. But before running you need to know how to walk. So I kept on trying and I got much better. Though it's still not perfect... the characters start having some kind of shape... hehe. That's my way to express how I feel and to overcome my real daily problems. The characters I created were much stronger and more courageous than me and so they could destroy all the evil (which in our language means boredom) even in my own life.
I don't think I would be the same person if in my past I hadn't been that lonely for so long. I sometimes miss that. I'm not lonely any more. I know a lot of amazing people who avoid that. Real friendship destroys loneliness... Though loneliness was my fountain of creativity, imagination and ideas, I don't want to go back to then...
2 cold whispers have been sold:
Here's your first cold whis... no! Here's your first warm whisper, and not the last.
I think you should show to the world those blogs, maybe it help you (and the other too =P).
Ah! And now, you don't need the power of loneliess. Now you have our friendship, you have a lot of people that will help you if you fall.
Kisses (mai he sapigut si s escriu aixi jajaja)
I had many of this thoughts before, and I can tell that I even miss them. But then I think a little and I let my feelings take me as I discover I'm really enjoying my new way of life.
Anyway its impossible not to believe what you do may be wrong or useless.
I'd like to hug you again now...
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